Hi All,

I dont quite know how i stumbled accross the forum but i joined and i thought i should Introduce myself and explain my story.

My name is Pat and i am from Scotland. I have an addiction to Dihydrocodeine that wasnt planned (is it ever??). I had basically had to go into hospital in 2005 to have an operation on my knee (ACL Rebuild) and was prescribed the DF118 pain med for the post OP pain.
Now, i had lost my job and didnt leave my house/garden for 18 months to 2 years due to anxiety/panic attacks/depression and IBS (the symptoms lead to me leaving work). I lived in fear of not being near a toilet and deficating myself, throw anxiety into the mix and you can imagine the state of panic i surviveed in. My local GP surgery sent me too psycatrist and a psycologist too try address and sort the issues but it was basically a waste of the psycxxxx time and my own as it didnt work for me.
Their was one doctor who had been my GP since i was a kid who i had never seen previously about my condition but his wife (also a doc) had a stroke and he had to leave. I had started to make progress with this doc as i was as honest as i could be with him and he sat and worked a strategy to address my anxiety etc but after his wifes stroke he had to leave and no other doctor seemed to care or wanted to use my previous GPs stratedgy, basically i was back to square one.
After a 3 year wait (a mixup off paper work caused this) i was finally taken for my ACL rebuild at a private hospital but paid for by the NHS and like i said , i was prescribed DHC for my post OP pain (2x 30Mg DHC 4 times daily if i remember correctly).
After my OP and once i was back up and aboutish again, i noticed that none of my panic attacks /anxiety/depression were bothering me, even my IBS seemed controlled as rather than the side effect of constipation, my bowels functioned how id deem normal or like i was before the IBS as i would go to the toilet as normal everyday. The problems began when my doctor stopped prescribing the DHC as it had been a fair time since my OP. My life that i thought was on the mend turned out to be nothing more than the medicine i was taking. I spoke to my GP about how things had improved for me while on the DHC and that i was almost back to how i was before my operation, the doctors in question didnt really care and they told me as much. I was offered anti depressant time and time again even though in my past, i had suffered 2 GRAN MAL seizures while on 2 different anti depressant medications. I was basically told, its either anti depressants or nothing, i was gutted and felt cheated that my underlying issues were not being addressed.
However, my fiancee during that period of my life, her mother was on an inordinant amount of medications for asthmha/athritis and a multitude of other things and she was prescribed something like 224 DHC 30mg every fortnight or so. She did not like the medication but the doctor continued to prescribe them as they were the best of a bad bunch as her pain meds had not been successfull. She basically had a mountain of these DHC boxes as they were in her medcine pack she picked up (litterally 2 carrier bags of pills for her ills, she takes 20+ tablets a day of mixed meds) and she said i could have them if they helped me and wanted them and i suppose thats where the problem began.
I started taking them again but had done more research on them and as i had read about the addictive properties i took them 2 weeks on and 2 off and i built my lifestyle around the on off periods. When my fiancee and I parted ways, the meds were no longer regularly coming in and all i had was what i had accuulated in the past BUT there was a problem, without my noticing (ignorance better word) to get the same effect to keep living 'normal' as i used to call it, my intake had gone to 30 x 30mg in the morning when i woke. It wasnt until i had split with my previous partner and not receiving my top ups from her unwanted medication bag that i realised the scale of the mess i had got myself in too. I am a strong minded person and strong willed (at that time anyway) and i decided to start reducing down 2 tablets every week (i had to out source meds from a neighbour as i didnt have enough stashed away) until i got down to 4 x 30mg a day which i was fairly proud off.
When i met my new partner, i told her everything as i like to be open as i possibly can and she was really supportive.
I stayed at 4 x 30mg until summer 07 when i decided to tell my doctor that i had contiued the DHC without his knowledge and i was seeking help to transition completly off them as 4 seemed the lowest i could get down too. I was sent to see the local drug center and the local community addiction team where i was offered 100ml of methadone. I was utterly bewildered and confused, since explaining to every doctor/specialist the reasons to how and why i was taking DHC, i could tell i was always frowned upon or branded as a Junkie. NOT one person seemed to understand that i was not taking the tablets to get high (nor did i feel high EVER) i took them to cure these problems i had and the doctors were not addressing. This caused me to feel bad and the amounts i was taking is slowly creeping back up, currently im taking 6 - 8 30mg DHC a day. My source for DHC has told me that her persriptions are coming to an end as her doc is lowering her down. I can get Oxycontin 10Mg/20Mg/40Mg/80Mg and a crushed 10Mg seem approximatly the same as my current dose of DHC. However, i DON'T want to take Oxy EVER again, i was taking some for 2 weeks in the past when their were DHC supply issues (2 crushed 20mgs in the morning) and i knew this was stupid at best but thought that it was only for two weeks so i didnt think it would be an issue. I was diagnosed with MS at the end of July 07 just days after the fortnight on the Oxy and i woke up in the morning and i couldnt walk or talk propperly, It was a BIG relapse of the relapsin remitting MS but we didnt know at the time, the hospital did a CT and i had swelling in my brain so i had no medication given too me at all until i could be MRI'd so i had to take nothing so the scan was clear. I had to go through the most hellish cold turkey (thats the only time ive went cold turkey and that was forced) and i cannot go onto the Oxy again as the withdrawl was clearly from the Oxy and a hint of the DHC. Now that i know what a lot of my problems were and i am being treated for MS, i want off the DHC. The cold turkey isnt as bad as the oxy, ive gone 6 days without DHC as the ct is more like a mild inconvenience and bad cold than anything else but my IBS and anxiety come flooding back. The doctors in my surgery dont seem to care about the underlying issues, they will not give me DHC, and i no longer know what to do. I could stroll off the DHC but the IBS and anxiety come back and the doctors want to give me anti depressants, i want to take as little medication as possible and i am no longer feeling depressed. If the doctors could help me with the problems that DHC solve, i know im strong minded enough to just walk away and i want too while i can but the GPs dont care, my Neuroligist and MS nurse wrote a letter too my GP and said for him to either give me the 4 DHC per day or something that will cure/mask/prevent my anxiety and IBS. Immodium stops the dihorrea but doesnt stop the strong stomache pains and i suppose it would be a Benzodiazpine id be prescribed for my anxiety and i feel thats just hopping out the pot and into the fire.
I have no idea as what to do, can anyone suggest how i could bring this DHC to an end? I realise id have to take some Diazepam incase of withdral (which i dont think would be bad enough to warrent them) but if it was only for a couple of weeks id comply.

I want to make the chemical intake as little as possible, id even rather try a herbal method for MS ( along with dietry and lifestyle changed) but i feel nobody is listning or understanding, ive been at this brick wall for too long. Since Diagnosis of my MS, ive opened my own buisness and had 2 lovley children (1 boy and 1 girl) and i need to extend my life for as long as i can. Can anyone advise please? Im just lost as to what to do.

Sorry for the long post.

Regards

Pat

PS: Nice to meet you all

Hi Pat,

Welcome to you too, and thank you for sharing your story.

I'm really sorry to have to say this, but the terms under which the SMMGP Forums are allowed to exist mean that we can't offer the kind of specific advice you deserve. Specifically, we can't give advice about individual cases.

I'm afraid that the best we can do is point you towards a couple of organisations which are in a better position to be able to help - namely The Alliance (www.m-alliance.org.uk) and Codeine Free (www.codeinefree.me.uk).

The whole of the SMMGP Team wish you luck in finding an answer, and we're sorry we can't be of more direct help.

Kind Regards,
Admin

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